Funeral

Just attended a friend's father wake earlier. With the new norm and the world of digitalization, felt that we  lost the human touch. I did asked my friend if anybody of our mutual friends came, she said not much as most of them could just do an instant transfer (DuitNow in Malaysia, PayNow in Singapore) for the condolences money.

It just strike me, that's it?! Not sure about you, but I would rather someone come and see me, talk to me in person rather than transfer money to my account. Well, not like I am going to have a funeral for myself anyhow. Just cremate me and scatter my ashes into the sea so I can drift to the seven seas.

Much that I advocate digitalization and I would still strike a balance to being human, being there, talking in person (not that we can hold each other now because of social distancing). What have we become to someone virtual? I was too perplexed by this thought that I had to journal this.

Journal Huh?!

 It has been a long time since I blog aka journal, years of my counselors been nagging me to journal my feelings for their analysis and finally today after 2 years of no longer speaking to my counselors, here it is!

Why the sudden? Probably today the moon, the sun and the earth has aligned to strike me to take action :D (kidding!) I have read many posts about journalling and their benefits, yet every time when I face the empty pages, I struggle to structure my words and contents.

Not sure about you, but my mind jumbles words, putting the right words are the toughest and seems to be at the back of my mind. I realized this is my weakness and I can't win at any verbal argument because my brain could not process the words fast enough although I know very well the answers. All I could do is to keep quiet and usually what is untrue and misunderstood about me, I can only cry in frustration. 

My emails too are often short and straight to the point, at times misunderstood as being too blunt. I need to elaborate more and probably have more words to my assignments as well (2500 words criteria?!). Therefore I should take this blogging or journal to train myself to PUT MORE RELEVANT WORDS to my content and would need to read more to expand my vocabulary (gosh! imagine that... WORDS! Even people's name evaporate from my grey matter like touching alcohol 💭) Wish me luck!